Aladdin		Grade: D
	Publisher: Sega (1994) Reviewed: 2003/10/8

Unlike the remarkable Aladdin games for the Genesis and SNES, this generic platformer is as bland as they come. The first stage finds our hero running from a sword-wielding goon while jumping barrels and dodging falling objects. It's more aggravating than fun, and the other stages aren't much better. Most are just a matter of finding a key on one platform and opening a door on another. Sometimes you'll toss an apple, but that's about as exciting as it gets. With repetitive, unimaginative levels and cheap hits out the wazoo, the action gets old real quick. Even the flying carpet sequence lacks any sense of thrill or excitement. Then there's the problem with imprecise controls that lead to many underserved deaths. On the bright side, the graphics and sound aren't bad at all. The characters are large and nicely animated, the backgrounds are attractive, and the music is taken straight from the movie. But the flashy presentation isn't enough to save the uninspired gameplay. © Copyright 2003 The Video Game Critic.

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1 player

Ax Battler		Grade: D-
	Publisher: Sega (1992) Reviewed: 2005/5/8

As an avid fan of Golden Axe (Genesis 1989), I was anxious to see what this portable version had to offer. Imagine my dismay when I started up Ax Battler and witnessed what resembled (gasp) an RPG! The diminutive characters and scrolling text were a far cry from the side-scrolling hack-n-slash mayhem I was anticipating. As it turns out, Ax Battler does contain its share of side-scrolling action, but it also incorporates (albeit unsuccessfully) RPG elements. The background story is hackneyed to say the least: the Golden Axe has been stolen by an evil army, and only one man can rescue it. Okay, I wasn't expecting Shakespeare, but the fact that the hero's real name is "Ax Battler" seems awfully contrived. Gameplay involves guiding a tiny cartoon character across the countryside where you encounter a wandering monster every few seconds. When this happens, both characters are presented on a separate screen in their full-sized, realistic form. However, instead turn-based combat, both fighters simply slash away at each other. It's as shallow as it is repetitious. Once you reach a specific destination (like a cave), the game turns into a more conventional side-scroller, but even these stages are dull and poorly designed. Ax Battler is ill conceived, attempting to incorporate both action and exploration. This ambition weighs the game down. Ax Battler's graphics and sound aren't bad, but you'll need the patience of a saint to finish this. © Copyright 2005 The Video Game Critic.

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1 player

Caesar's Palace		Grade: D
	Publisher: Majesco (1994) Reviewed: 2003/11/9

I suppose if you were stuck in a hotel room by yourself and wanted to pass the time, Caesar's Palace wouldn't be a bad game to have. With video poker, video horse racing, slots, blackjack, craps, roulette, and keno, there's more than enough variety. You start with $5K, moving a guy around a multi-tiered casino. For some reason, moving is a hassle because you're always getting caught up on the scenery. The music is absolutely terrible, so you'll want to turn down the volume immediately. Not being much of a gambler, I gravitate towards the blackjack and video poker. Unfortunately, some games are initially unavailable (including blackjack), and certain tables are reserved for "high rollers". Boy, you'd think Majesco was deliberately trying to make the game less fun! A few of the games, like slots, keno, and roulette, aren't even worth playing because they rely solely on luck. Graphically, the game has a few nice digitized images, but in most games you need to scroll around to see everything, which is a pain. Likewise, placing bets seems to require more work than necessary. For a gambling game, Caesar's Palace serves its purpose, but just barely. © Copyright 2003 The Video Game Critic.

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1 player

Deep Duck Trouble Starring Donald Duck		Grade: B-
	Publisher: Sega (1994) Reviewed: 2003/11/26

This endearing little platform game really grew on me. The bizarre premise is that Uncle Scrooge has obtained a cursed relic that's transformed him into a floating balloon and Donald must return the relic to undo the curse. I understand this is also under consideration as the plot for the next Indiana Jones movie. Like Quackshot for the Genesis, Deep Duck Trouble has that certain charm only Disney can deliver. The graphics are top-notch, with large characters that are humorously animated. Donald can hop on enemies (ala Mario), but even more fun is your ability to kick blocks, which can knock off enemies, expose power-ups, or open new areas. You can choose what order you play the stages, and there's plenty of variety within each. The only stage I didn't find particularly fun was the obligatory underwater stage. The control is dead-on, but expect some slowdown. In fact, the game seems like it's moving in slow motion at times, especially if you've just finished a game like Sonic the Hedgehog. All in all, Deep Duck Trouble is a very straightforward platform game that's better than most. © Copyright 2003 The Video Game Critic.

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1 player

Frank Thomas Big Hurt Baseball		Grade: C-
	Publisher: Acclaim (1995) Reviewed: 2005/5/8

Judging from looks alone, Big Hurt is easily the best baseball game for the Game Gear. Players move with fluid motion, and the pitchers look especially good as they deliver their pitches. Although the gameplay is similar to other Game Gear baseball titles, there are too many lulls in the action. First, when you turn the game on, you're required to sit through no less than six (!) intro screens. Let's get on with it already!! Once the action is underway, you then have to wait for each batter to approach the plate; the pitchers also tend to pause on the mound. I tried to adjust this, but even the "fast play" option isn't a marked improvement. Another flaw lies in the pitching controls, which are more complicated than they need to be. After aiming the ball, you select the pitch type (what the heck's a "sinner"?) and lastly, choose a pitch speed. The problem is, most of the time choosing a pitch's speed doesn't make any sense. Who would want to throw a slow fastball or a fast changeup? Batted balls tend to be hit weakly - most don't clear the infield. Fielding controls are decent, although they could be more responsive. Overall Big Hurt is a good-looking game but its pace is too slow for a portable title. © Copyright 2005 The Video Game Critic.

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1 player

Joe Montana Football		Grade: C
	Publisher: Sega (1991) Reviewed: 2004/2/16

As long as you're not looking for anything fancy, Joe Montana is a fun little football game. All the NFL teams are included (circa 1991), but they're all rendered in blue and red uniforms, and except for slightly different playbooks, they're all the same. The simple control scheme doesn't let you perform any moves when you run with the ball, and as a result the running game is virtually non-existent. Fortunately, the passing game is quite effective. Like Tecmo Football, you can switch between receivers on the fly, and your quarterback zips the ball nicely. There aren't many sound effects, but players are tackled with a satisfying thud. Graphically, the game has nicely defined players, and it's easy to follow the large football. The goalposts look terrific, and the players perform a hilariously cheesy "celebration dance" after each touchdown. Montana is pretty shallow, but the game moves along quickly with no pauses in the action. The CPU provides a reasonable challenge, but sometimes does dumb things like run to the back of the end zone for a safety. Not too hot and not too cold, Joe Montana provides an average portable football experience. © Copyright 2004 The Video Game Critic.

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1 or 2 players

Lion King, The		Grade: C-
	Publisher: Virgin (1994) Reviewed: 2003/11/9

I wasn't a huge fan of the 16-bit version of Lion King (SNES, Genesis), and this portable edition offers even less to get excited about. The graphics are certainly acceptable, with smoothly animated, detailed animals and beautiful orange sunsets. But the color-by-number gameplay will have you frustrated and bored. The stages follow Simba from being a cub all the way up to his final confrontation with Scar. The jumping controls are very forgiving, as your lion will grab hold of a ledge if you don't make the jump cleanly. The game tries to add some variety by letting you interact with other animals, but I experienced a fair amount of frustration from animals tossing me places I didn't want to go. Many stages are painfully monotonous rock platforms, where it's difficult to determine where to go next. But the worst part is that you have to play as a cub for most of the game! After six stages of controlling a cub, I was thinking "When is this [expletive] lion gonna grow up?!" A unique "roar" move gives the game a hint of originality, but it's useless for most of the game. Even the "catch the seeds" bonus round falls flat. The music is high-quality (taken from the movie), but when all is said and done, Lion King doesn't amount to much. © Copyright 2003 The Video Game Critic.

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1 player